My article re-drafted/What is Reality?

10 Jun

What is Reality?

Recently I came across something called Quantum Mechanics, and wow, just wow! I am so excited to know more.

I don’t claim to know anything about this stuff but what I came across has really intrigued me. I never thought about looking at the world in this way. Now suddenly I think I’m Einstein!

I’d like to paint in huge letters along London’s Waterloo Bridge the words ‘Wake Up’. So big you could see them by satellite. Wouldn’t it be great if this made the headlines? Because it’s just such an awesome concept. To me anyway.

I’m now thinking. Are we existing in a primeval view of the world, unaware of any reality other than what we see? Stumping human evolution through lack of knowledge and ignorance to it?

According to Socrates ‘There is only one good, knowledge, and one evil, ignorance’.

I’m very curious now. Does the clue for true reality lie within Quantum Mechanics, the study of how atoms interact? Apparently atoms are tiny little particles of energy that make everything in the universe, even the air we breathe. Physicists say they move like vibrating waves to form our material world. And a simple act of observation can interrupt their movements.

I’m no scientist, so I can only discuss these things in midget proportions. But the way I read it is Quantum Mechanics suggests these atoms can be in the past and the future simultaneously. And in two places at one time, even billions of miles apart. Dr Quantum’s double slit experiment demonstrates how they only come together when observed. I’m just so wowed by this experiment, I had to watch it a few times to actually grasp it. Take a look for yourself:

I’d like to use Schroedinger’s cat theory as an example. But if you don’t understand the double slit experiment, Schroedinger’s cat will just confuse you even more. It did me. If you do understand the double slit experiment, then you don’t need Schroedinger’s cat at all. It’s just a metaphor for the Copenhagen interpretation of Quantum Mechanics. It describes the concept of superposition, which means as long as no one’s looking, it’s possible to be in two states at the same time. Beats me! But apparently that’s how it works.

So if we are made of atoms then does this mean we can be in two places simultaneously? In the past and in the future? Quantum Mechanics implies we can. Every time we make a choice, all possible outcomes are taking place in another universe. We can’t interact with these parallels of ourselves, so what relevance has this to us?

Quantum Mechanics proposes we are both here and not here. The simple act of observation brings us into existence. I think therefore I am, right? So this means that everything we see only exists when we chose to see it. Our imagination and thoughts create reality. Accept, we are what we expect to be. We expect this reality to be real because we don’t know any different. But Quantum Mechanics suggests we have a choice.

Our five physical senses work by interpreting vibrations. Atoms vibrate to make things seem solid, so matter doesn’t really exist. What? Yeah, apparently there is no such thing as matter.

I can see why people would fear this concept. And why they, including me, would want to gather as many material things as possible. Trapped in a low vibrational dense state by fear, encouraged by the media. What if the media is manipulating us to create someone else’s reality. I can see now how television shows (that I love) like The Only Way is Essex and The Real Housewives of Every State in America influence our lifestyle. Alluding us to want more material things. Maybe it’s just another manipulative technique the government use to exploit our freedom. Sadly, Thatcher-ism still dominates today’s society, encouraging our belief in this seemingly materialistic existence to keep us vibrating on this low-frequency. To keep us under control.

Can we change this?

Even our thoughts are made are of atoms. Positive thoughts create high vibrational frequency’s and the opposite for fear. If we can change the way we think, we can change our own frequency. When we are vibrating at the same frequency as the things we want then we can also attract them. I really love this concept, but, can we really create our own existence?

Apparently, yes we can.


My article – Can We Really Create Our Own Reality?

10 Jun

Can We Really Create Our Own Reality?

I’d like to paint in huge letters along London’s Waterloo Bridge the words ‘wake up’. So big you could see them by satellite. Wouldn’t it be great if this made the headlines?

Because too many people are existing with this primeval view of the world. Unaware of any reality other than what they see. Stale in their own acknowledgement. Stumping human evolution through lack of knowledge and ignorance to it. 

‘There is only one good, knowledge, and one evil, ignorance’ (Socrates).

The people who think they already know everything are usually the ones that don’t have a clue. The clue for the real reality lies within quantum mechanics, the study of how atoms interact. Atoms are little particles of energy. Also known as the God particle, these atoms are what makes everything in the universe, even the air we breathe. They move like waves which vibrate and form our material world. A simple act of observation can interrupt their movements. Atoms break down into energy moving from one form to another, like ice into water. Atoms are constantly vibrating and no experiment has ever been able to stabilise them.

Quantum mechanics has discovered that these atoms can be in the past and the future simultaneously. And in two places at one time, even billions of miles apart. They only come together when observed. The double slit experiment proves this idea of superposition. Visit the link for further explanation:

I would like to use the Schroedinger’s cat theory as an example. But if you don’t understand the double slit experiment, Schroedinger’s cat will just confuse you even more. If you do understand the double slit experiment, then you don’t need Schroedinger cat at all. It’s just a metaphor for the Copenhagen interpretation of quantum mechanics. It describes the concept of superposition, which means as long as no one is looking, it’s possible to be in two states at the same time.

So if we are made of atoms then does this mean we can be in two places simultaneously? In the past and in the future? Quantum mechanics suggests we can. Every time we make a choice, all possible outcomes are taking place in other universes. We can’t interact with these parody’s of ourselves. So you may ask, what relevance has this to me?


Quantum physics suggests we are both here and not here. The simple act of observation brings us into existence. I think therefore I am, right? So this means that everything we see only exists when we chose to see it. Our imagination and thoughts create reality. Accept, we are what we expect to be. We expect this reality to be real because we don’t know any better. But quantum mechanics suggests we have a choice.

Our five physical senses work by interpreting vibrations. Atoms vibrate to make things seem solid. Therefore matter doesn’t really exist.

People fear this concept. So they gather as much material things as they can. Trapped in a low vibrational dense state by fear, which is encouraged by the media. The media manipulates you through words and images to create someone else’s reality. Television shows like The Only Way is Essex and The Real Housewives of Every State in America, influence our lifestyle alluding us to want more material things. It’s just another manipulative technique the government use to exploit our freedom. Sadly, Thatcher-ism still dominates today’s society. The Thatcherite economy encourages our belief in this seemingly materialistic existence to keep us vibrating on this low-frequency. To keep us under control.

Can we change this?

Thoughts are also energy which vibrates at different frequency’s. Positive thoughts create a high vibrational frequency and the opposite for fear. If we can change the way we think, we can change our own frequency. When we are vibrating at the same frequency as the things we want then we attract those things we focus on. That’s the law of attraction. So, can we really create our own existence?

Apparently yes we can.


Ursh Fach Dang Duach

7 Jun

A One Act Play


Sarah Kay Hair




         The year is 2013 set in Dover, Kent. A group consisting of 13 members come to this derelict Bastion named The Smokey. They come here on a nightly bases to perform certain rituals. Lit with candles, this dark old fort is restricted from the public, but this group know a secret entrance. The walls are sprayed in red paint with the words Ursh Fash Dang Duach. The group are all dressed in black with suppressed personalities. They are all sat in a circle holding hands chanting. The leader Angus, an ex social worker is sat in the middle of the circle. He has a dark and intimidating persona. Blake, a shy but well spoken character is in his early 30’s. He is Angus’s sidekick, and does what he is told. He has invited a new member Jeff. As Blake is guiding Jeff towards The Smokey, and through the secret entrance, we can hear the chanting getting louder as they get closer. When in, the chanting stops with the command of Angus.


ANGUS: Blake, you brought another friend, ah well more the merrier! Welcome…


          Hand gesturing towards Jeff.


BLAKE: Jeff.


ANGUS: Come join our circle Jeff.


          Blake guides Jeff to the circle and every one shuffles to make space. Jeff wearyingly sits down as everyone is staring at him sussing him out. Blake sits down next to him and takes his hand. On the other side of Jeff is Sally who is a very attractive young woman, she  smiles at Jeff and takes his other hand. Angus is watching attentively then closes his eyes and continues to chant. The group precede. Blake squeezes Jeff’s hand as an instruction to participate.


ANGUS: Ursh fach dang duach


THE WHOLE GROUP: Dang dang dang dang, fach fach fach fach, ursh ursh ursh ursh, duach dang fach ursh, ursh fach dang duach, ursh ursh ursh ursh, fach fach fach fach, dang dang dang dang…


         Angus stops chanting, so the whole group stop too.


ANGUS: How is everyone feeling, good?


          The group all respond with enthusiastic grins and nods.


ANGUS: And you Jeff, how are you feeling?


JEFF: I, I dunno, how am I supposed to feel?


ANGUS: You are new to this, it is okay. You will understand. In precisely, Blake, time?


         Blake reaches in a bag to see what time it is.


BLAKE: Ten fifty.


ANGUS: In precisely one hour and ten minutes something magical is going to happen. A new world will be upon us. We have been calling upon the the Angel Aiwiss. He informs me of an impending apocalypse. All civilisation as we know it will be destroyed. Mass storms, earthquakes, and floods will demolish this planet. But Aiwiss assures me we will be saved. We have been chosen for our redemption and we who believe will be saved! An alien spaceship is on it’s way to take us to our new world.


         The group jeer with excitement.


JEFF, To Blake: What is this, some kind of religious group?


          Blake doesn’t answer, he looks down with a guilty conscience for getting Blake there on false pretensions.


ANGUS: It’s okay Jeff, we was all new to this once. You are a chosen one, like every single one of us here. We have all been chosen. We will all be saved. The Angel Aiwiss of Enoc assures us that we have nothing to fear.


          The group clap with sounds of over enthusiastic glee, with wolf whistles and screeches of excitement. Jeff attempts to get up. Sally pulls him back down. Angus is watching attentively.


SALLY, with seductive eyes: Stay Jeff, you will be saved.


BLAKE: Just stay to the end Jeff. Looks in his bag at the time: Only one hour left.


JEFF, spoken with sarcasm as Blake had led him there in the belief that they were going to an illegal rave: No I’m sorry Blake but this is some screwed up rave mate.


          Jeff goes to leave but Blake tries to stop him. There is a bit of a scuffle.


JEFF: Get of me you freak!


          Angus obstructs the exist as Jeff tries to get away. Jeff is restrained by Angus, Blake and a few others.


ANGUS: Sally, Get the kit!


          Sally rushes to where Angus was sat and takes a needle and a bottle out from a bag.


ANGUS: Quick. Set it up. Hurry will you?


          Sally nervously fills the needle with a sedative and rushes over to pass the needle to Angus. But his hands are tightly restraining Jeff who is struggling to get free.


ANGUS, he shouts: Does it look like I can do it? Does it? Stick it in his thigh!


          Jeff’s strength proves to be a challenge, even for five other men. In a panicky mess Sally drops the needle. Angus screams at Sally.


ANGUS: Woman! In the name of our Deity, just stick it in!


SALLY: Done! Angus it’s done.


          She falls to the ground with relief. Jeff’s body goes limp and all the men relax him to the floor. Jeff is murmuring.


ANGUS: Tie him up. He can not leave this place now.


          They all drag Jeff’s body over to a pillar. While Angus composes himself, slicks his long dark fringe back. When tying Jeff to this pillar one of the group members named Garland who has tourette syndrome is singing The Mariners Revenge song.


GARLAND, with enthusiasm:  Find him bind him tie him to a pole, and break his fingers to splinters. Drag him to a hole until he wakes up, naked, clawing at the ceiling of his grave…


ANGUS: Now now Garland, remember why you were saved!


         Jeff is tied up and Sally is looking concerned.


ANGUS: Sally, it is for his own good. He will thank us when we have been saved. Blake, time? We can not have any more distractions. Come everyone, gather.


          The group re-circle. Blake gets the watch from a bag.


BLAKE: It’s Eleven ten.


ANGUS: Will you just leave your watch out of that stupid bag? Set the alarm for twelve. He raises his voice: Ninety minutes from now the world as we know it will come to an end. But we will be saved. Aiwass assures me the aliens will look after us. They are our friends. They have special suits for us so we can breathe when entering their world. They have built us a bio-dome. It is an artificial copy of our natural environment supplied with all necessary equipment, materials and even animals. Aiwiss tells me it is beautifully afloat with plants, flowers, trees and even rivers thriving with trout.  It is a luxurious set up and we are very lucky to have been chosen. Already on board will be others from other country’s. It is going to be one hell of an exciting journey. Ursh fach dang duach!


          The whole group  jeer with excitement. In their circle they take hands and join in on the chant.


THE WHOLE GROUP: Dang dang dang dang, fach fach fach fach, ursh ursh ursh ursh, duach dang fach ursh, ursh fach dang duach, ursh ursh ursh ursh, fach fach fach fach, dang dang dang dang…


          Jeff starts to come around. Angus looks over at Jeff and stops the chant.


ANGUS: Now we must remember why we are chosen? Why were you chosen Jeff?


          Everyone stares at Jeff. He is unable to respond apart from murmur. He is dribbling. Sally is concerned for him so attends to him nervously with some tissue.


SALLY, reassuringly and wiping his mouth: This is for your own good Jeff. You will see.


          Angus gives sally an accepting nod so she sits with him as Angus continues to speak.


ANGUS: Perhaps when Jeff is ready he can tell us his story. We all have a story for being here. We all have a reason. Blake, tell Jeff why you are here. Blake was not the name you were born with is it?


BLAKE: No Angus. He looks at Jeff then looks down: I was born Abdul Razaq.  I was born a Muslim.


          The group all look down with pity as they know Blake’s story is sad.


Four years ago I was involved in an accident. I should have been driving a bit slower. But the traffic lights weren’t working. It was a really sunny day. Driving my mums Audi TT. I had my sun glasses on. I felt really good. Actually, really full of myself. I thought I looked really cool with the tunes blaring. I didn’t have a care in the world. All I had on my mind was chicks. The traffic lights weren’t working. As I come round the corner there was this double decker bus parked so I didn’t see them crossing. The mother was crossing pushing a buggy. I couldn’t stop in time. I hit her. I hit an 18 month old baby girl. I killed a baby.


          He breaks down in tears and falls to the floor. Angus comes over to him and touches his shoulder reassuringly.


ANGUS: Blake, come. You are forgiven. Continue.


GARLAND: Bollocks!


BLAKE, he gets up of the floor, frowns at Garland: I was given three years in prison but only spent one year inside. When I got out, my family wouldn’t allow me back in the home, said I brought shame upon the family. I had no where to go. I was a mess. I prayed to Allah but I spent so many weeks on the street I gradually lost my faith. Then just as I was about to give up on life completely, that’s when I met Sally. Sally brought me here.


          Blake looks at Sally and smiles, Sally smiles back and then at Jeff.


SALLY, smiling: See, you have been saved too.


BLAKE: Everything happens for a reason. The accident happened in order for me to open my eyes. I was blind but now I can see.


         The group clap. Some pat Blake on the back.


BLAKE, gesturing towards Sally: Like Sally.


          Sally is giving Jeff some water. She looks at Jeff then looks at Blake and shakes her head.


BLAKE: Go on Sally!


SALLY, looking ashamed: Well I, I used to charge men for sex. To pay for my heroine addiction. I never had no faith then. Not in nothing or no one. I didn’t even have a reason to live, but I fell pregnant. I was stupid. I didn’t think about the poor little mite growing inside me. I didn’t even think to get off the drugs, it never occurred to me. But when that baby was born. I realised what a mistake I had made. Seeing that poor little thing suffer. I wanted her to get better. But she didn’t. She died.


          Sally cries. Jeff is now able to talk a bit more.


JEFF: Oh Sally that’s terrible.


SALLY: I’ll never forgive myself, but if only I knew of  Ursh fach dang duach my baby may have survived.


ANGUS: Your baby forgives you. Aiwiss is certain of that. To Jeff: You see Jeff, we are all here because each one of us are responsible for causing at least one unintentional death.


          Garland laughs.


ANGUS: Now now Garland.


JEFF: What did he do?


SALLY: What didn’t he do?


ANGUS: Sally we all have a right to forgiveness. To Jeff gesturing towards Garland: He’s still in transition.


SALLY, to Jeff: I still wouldn’t trust him on that ship.


JEFF: Well?


GARLAND: Bollocks!


ANGUS: Go on Garland, tell Jeff why you are here.


GARLAND: I eat people.


ANGUS, patronisingly: Garland?


GARLAND: I ate people.


SALLY: Still would if he had the chance.


          Garland is licking his lips.


JEFF, feeling unnerved: Untie me!


ANGUS, laughs: Garland knows if he so much as takes a bite out of another person he won’t be saved. Don’t you Garland?


GARLAND, moves away from Jeff. In his croaky voice: Yeah. Yeah.


JEFF: How is eating people unintentional?


ANGUS: Garland was born to crave the flesh of another human being. He did not choose to have such an urge. It is an illness that he must be cured from. Garland knows this. Garland open your mouth.


          Garland opens his mouth to show Jeff he has no teeth.


ANGUS: Garland knows cannibalism is wrong. He ripped his own teeth out as prevention from randomly sinking his teeth in to someone.


JEFF: I’ve never killed anyone though. To Blake: Why have you brought me here?


BLAKE: Think. Think back.


JEFF: Never. Never ever in my whole life have I killed anyone.


BLAKE: I know about you Jeff. You were seeing a girl. A friend of my sisters.


JEFF: So what? What are you talking about?


BLAKE: You remember Nadia?




BLAKE: Think back, about 7 years ago. You had sex with Nadia, an Asian girl.


JEFF: Oh yeah, I didn’t know her name. Why?


BLAKE: You know she had an abortion right?


JEFF: No. What’s that got to do with me?


BLAKE: It was your child.


JEFF: What? No way! She never said anything. Why wouldn’t she tell me something like this?


BLAKE: She couldn’t even tell her family. They had an arranged marriage all set up for her. Sex before marriage was totally unacceptable. Her family would have gone mad.  


JEFF: So how is this my fault though? I didn’t make her abort.


BLAKE: No you didn’t but you were involved. Obviously if you took precautions it wouldn’t have happened.


JEFF: Well why is she not here then?


BLAKE, looking over at the girl with long beautiful black hair: She is here.


JEFF: Oh my God! I’m so sorry Nadine!


NADIA: Nadia!


JEFF: Nadia, I’m so sorry I had no idea. You should have said something.


NADIA: I couldn’t risk my family finding out. I had to run away. Angus found me, it was my destiny to be found by Angus, as it is yours Jeff.


JEFF: I dunno Nadia, it doesn’t wash with me.


NADIA: It will.


ANGUS: Blake, time?


BLAKE: It’s eleven forty five.


ANGUS: We must prepare.


          Angus reaches in a bag pulls out some black attire and throws it over to Blake. Everyone is checking each other over and checking their rucksacks, full of books, photo’s and other personal trinkets.


BLAKE: Here Jeff you need to put this on.


JEFF: Untie me then.


          Blake looks over at Angus. Angus shakes his head.


JEFF, breaking down: I’ll not run away. I’ll stay okay?


ANGUS: Very well. Blake, Garland, watch him.


          Blake unties Jeff as Garland watches attentively. Jeff composes himself. Blake gives him the black shirt and trousers.


JEFF: You want me to get changed in front of everyone?


ANGUS, to Blake: Take him behind there. Pointing to a wall, which would have been a room hundreds of years ago.


          They go behind the wall.


JEFF, quietly to Blake: You don’t seriously believe this bull do you?


BLAKE: Yes I do.


ANGUS: Hurry, we have preparations to make.


          Jeff and Blake come back to the circle.


The Angel Aiwiss has informed me that in order for a successful operation we must sustain communication with him. We must ensure correct procedures are being implemented. Everyone, please verify there is no metal on your body or on your clothes and check the person next to you.


BLAKE: Jeff, you need to take out your piercings.


JEFF: All of them?




          Jeff takes out his piercings from his eye brow and tongue.


BLAKE: Any more?




NADIA, looking in his groin area: Are you sure Jeff? Any metal taken on board will interfere with the spaceship. It’s really dangerous and you could mess up the whole operation.


JEFF: Oh okay then. He puts his hands down his trousers and takes out a metal bar.


ANGUS: Who has got the grimoire? We must not leave the book behind.


SALLY, looking in her rucksack: I have it. I have the book. I have all the books.


ANGUS, looking at Blake: Time?


BLAKE: Eleven fifty five!


          Everyone is anxiously waiting for twelve o’clock. There is a long silence.


ANGUS: Time?


BLAKE: Eleven fifty nine.


GARLAND: Bollocks!


          There is a 50 second silence.


BLAKE, frowns at Garland: 10 seconds left. Nine, eight.


          Everyone joins in the countdown.


ALL ACCEPT JEFF: Seven, six, five, four, three, two, one!


          The alarm goes on the phone. Angus goes to the exit to see if the spaceship has arrived. He looks confused because nothing is there. Everyone watches him attentively as he becomes more and more baffled.


SALLY: They are there, right? Angus?


ANGUS, still looking out of the exit: Maybe in a minute.


GARLAND: Bollocks!


JEFF: Surprise surprise, the aliens didn’t show!


BLAKE: They’re just late, right?


          Everyone is looking at Angus and looking extremely concerned.


ANGUS, coming away from the exit and looking at how concerned everyone is:  I need to contact Aiwiss. Everyone, gather.


          Everyone gathers in a circle around Angus.


ANGUS: Ursh, fach, dang, duach.


          They all take hands and join in the chant, accept Jeff who is looking all smug.


THE WHOLE GROUP: Dang dang dang dang, fach fach fach fach, ursh ursh ursh ursh, duach dang fach ursh, ursh fach dang duach, ursh ursh ursh ursh, fach fach fach fach, dang dang dang dang…


ANGUS: Ah behold!


          The group stop their chant and all eyes are fixated on Angus.


ANGUS: Aiwiss tells me there is only one way to enter the new world. He tells me that our bodies are but just vehicles to hold us in this world. It is only our souls we can save. Save our souls! Save our souls! Save our souls! He gets louder and quicker. Save our souls, save our souls!


ALL ACCEPT JEFF: Save our souls, save our souls. The group gets more and more excited: Save our souls, save our souls.


ANGUS: Alas! We do not have much time.


          The group are now quiet and curious.


ANGUS: We  need to release our souls from this physical self. We need to release our souls from this physical plane. Louder and faster: We need to release our souls! We need to release our souls!


ALL ACCEPT JEFF: We need to release our souls! We need to release our souls!


JEFF: This is crazy! I have heard enough! You are all crazy!


          Jeff runs to the exit. Everyone in his way tries to stop him but they can’t. Jeff gets away and Blake chases after him. Jeff and Blake are gone from the stage.


ANGUS: Never mind him now, we must hurry, we have no more time. Reassuringly looking at the group: Aiwiss is with us, he ensures our safety. Are we all OK? 


          Angus looks at everyone. They are now looking relieved.


ANGUS, he moves around the group looking into each and everyone’s eyes and touching them on the shoulder: Hold your faith. Own your confessions. Know your true self. Live for eternity in elation. Love Aiwiss. Love me. Come with me. Louder. Come with me! Come with me!


          The group jeers with excitement.


ANGUS, picks up the belt Jeff left behind and continues walking around the group: Hold your faith. Own your confessions. Know your true self. Live for eternity in elation. Love Aiwiss. Love me. Come with me. Aiwiss is with us. Ursh fach dang duach. Ursh fach dang duach.


All: Ursh fach dang duach. Ursh fach dang duach.

          The candles all burn out. The stage is now in complete darkness. The chanting continues but as Angus strangles the co-operating group members one by one we hear one less group member chant as we hear them choke to death.


GARLAND, he is now being strangled by Angus. He is choked before finishing his last word: Boll…


          Now it is only Angus chanting. He is interrupted by a voice. It is Blake. Blake lights his lighter. We can just make out Angus and Blake on stage.


BLAKE: Jeff got away, he was too fast.


ANGUS: Never mind him. Our time has come.


BLAKE: And everyone?


ANGUS: Everyone has gone. Aiwiss tells me they are safe in the new world. It is.


          Angus is interrupted by sounds coming from outside The Smokey.


ANGUS: What is that noise?


          The noise is getting louder. And dogs can be heard barking.


BLAKE: It’s the police!


        Jeff is outside with a group of police.


JEFF, can be heard shouting: In there, they’re in there, through that hole.


        Angus panics, but before Angus and Blake have a chance to do anything The Smokey is lit with torches. They are seized by a group of police, and barking dogs.


JEFF, pointing towards Angus: He’s the leader. The pointing towards Blake: And he brought me here.


       Two police officers are restraining Jeff, and two are restraining Blake. Both are being handcuffed and told their rights. Another police officer shines the torch over the dead bodies. Jeff looks around in horror. He runs over to Nadia. Angus and Blake are carted away. Blake goes co-operatively but  Angus is still struggling and shouting shouting as he is dragged out off the secret entrance and off stage.


JEFF, kneeling down to Nadia:Nadia, Nadia? Oh you stupid girl.


          The police instruct Jeff away. Jeff is assisted out of the secret entrance and off stage. Two police officers are now on stage amongst the dead bodies, looking horrified.


POLICE OFFICER, on the phone: You need to get the forensics down here, we have a major situation. It’s not a pretty sight.


        Curtain closes.





The End

Vixens Global Premiere

3 Jun

Vixens Global Premiere.

It Was only just a Dream, or was it?

25 May

It Was only just a Dream, or was it?



Set in a well lived in run down lounge, dimly lit by a lamp and the TV. Aggie is sat watching Saturday night TV in just a T-shirt and her underwear, and un-kept hair, and eating junk food, with a collection of rappers and coke tins building up around her. The phone rings, Aggie answers still eating, dropping food down her chest.

AGGIE: Hello


AGGIE: Yeah (high pitched)


AGGIE: Noooo (dragged out)


AGGIE: Oh I would never have thought that!


AGGIE: I’m glad I do tins, sod the frozen section, sod that


AGGIE: well (dragged out)


AGGIE: I know (dragged out)


AGGIE: oh dear


AGGIE: Alright then, bye

Aggie continues watching TV and eating while dropping food down her.

The focus is now on the TV presenter on the TV.

TV PRESENTER: Tonight we have a whole heap of entertainment in store for you gorgeous people.

Yes you, you at home, we have a line-up of the legendary Tom Jones, singing live here on the show.

And a guest appearance from the fabulous Carrie Bradshaw, here to share with us her amazing experience of starring in Sex in the City.

We are also offering you, yes you, the opportunity to win a luxury holiday for two in the sunny Maldives.

Also one lucky lady is going to have the surprise of her life.

Aggie are you there, Aggie please refrain from swearing you are on live TV

Aggie then appears in the corner of her TV screen, Aggie frantically looks around the room for a hidden camera, the audience on the TV are laughing hysterically as they watch Aggies desperate plea to find the camera. Aggie starts to go mad looking for the camera.

TV PRESENTER: Oops Aggie doesn’t seem to be too happy

The audience is still laughing, it gets louder and louder, Aggie is now trashing the room looking for the hidden camera, and smashes her TV of its table, before she crumbles to the ground in a fit of hysterical tears. The lights fade to black as the scene closes.




Maggie then wakes up, in her freshly clean spread of cotton sheets, and huge puffed pillows, covering her huge oak bed, she looks around her light cream room, of cleanness and oak, and lets out a huge sigh of relief, then she gets up and prepares for her middle class lifestyle day, she takes out her suit from her cupboard and hugs it as if to say she remembers her dream, and realises she is lucky to have her life.




Set in a middle class dining area/environment, lit by candle light and soft beautiful lamps. Maggie is sat with her middle class friends, drinking nice wine and taking about fundamental matters, such as post hoc ergo propter hoc, when one of her posh male friend recalls a dream he had recently about being on the doll and living on a council estate, with nothing, and barely even being able to eat. Maggie is then astonished at the coincident that she also had a similar dream, that she was a slob. As she explains, they all laugh, while drinking wine…

All sat around a dining table, drinking France’s Vin de Pays wines, and chatting intellectual chit chat.

VALERIE:Fred’s going to this heavy metal mosh pit thing at the weekend

GLORIA: Ha-ha, are you ever going to grow out of that rubbish and actually get your hair cut?

(They all laugh)

HENRY:just because you are boring Val, maybe you should go with him!

FREDERICK: yeah Val you should come with me. You will love it.

VALERIE:Nooo no no, I’m trying not to drink, in fact I don’t ever want to drink again

HENRY:She says with a glass of wine in her hand

(They all laugh)

GLORIA: Oh Valerie, you are a hypocrite

VALERIE:Well this is just one, any-more and I will feel utter crap tomorrow

HENRY:You just think you will feel crap tomorrow because of the alcohol, when really you will feel crap because you already believe you will. You really do need to let your hair down. It’s only a drink and it could do you the world of good.

FREDERICK: No she really does beat herself up the next day; she’ll be moping about all week, seriously.

VALERIE:I really do, I just feel like I am standing on the edge of a cliff, and it takes me a week to recover.

HENRY:You think, because you have a drink you will feel crap. Have you ever heard of post hoc something or other, I can’t remember the exact name but it’s a human fallacy that we as human beings have a natural ability to assume that because something happened, something else occurred as a result of that action.

GLORIA: Google it

VALERIE:Sure, Henry can you pass me my Ipad, just on the side behind you

(Henry passes the ipad down to Gloria, who passes it on to Frederick, then to Valerie. Valer googles ‘post hoc’.)

VALERIE:Ah here it is ‘post hoc ergo proctor hoc’ after this, therefore because of this…

FREDERICK: Yeah that’s it

VALERIE:Ok but what has this got to do with me not wanting to drink?

HENRY:I can’t remember

FREDERICK: Anyway, changing the subject, I had the weirdest dream last night! I dreamt that I was jobless, on the dole and living on a council estate!

(Everyone looks at Frederick with surprise)

HENRY:Ha ha, I can just imagine you strolling about with your trackys tucked in your socks!

FREDERICK: I swear I couldn’t even afford trackys in my dream, oh it was awful

VALERIE:Actually, that reminds me… (With a puzzled expression) come to think of it, I had a dream quite similar.

The scene fades to darkness as the scene closes.




Maggie wakes up, in the middle of her trashed living room floor, sobbing her heart out…



25 May






RADIO PRESENTER: (D) Ahhh ‘Moon Shadow’ by Cat Stevens. This song brings on some wonderful nostalgia, full of meaning; finding hope in any situation. We will have plenty of songs like this beautiful piece to play you throughout this afternoon to lead you into an evening full of pleasant thoughts. But first here is the local news and weather update for here in the south east.




FLORA: Cat Stevens gave up his singing to be a Muslim didn’t he love?


TERRY: Yes dear, he’s renamed himself as Yusuf Islam.


FLORA: Shame! He made some beautiful songs. (STARTS SINGING BADLY TO ‘WILD WORLD’ BY CAT STEVENS)


Now that I’ve lost everything to you You say you wanna start something new And it’s breakin’ my heart you’re leavin’ Baby, I’m grievin




TERRY AND FLORA: Oh, baby, baby, it’s a wild world


RADIO NEWS REPORTER: (D) (OVERLAPS THE SINGING) Martin Robinson former TV presenter and actor has died, aged 77.


TERRY: (STILL SINGING) I’ll always remember you like a child, girl.


FLORA: (ABRUPTLY OVERLAPS) Did I just hear right? Martin Robinson is dead?


TERRY: Err yes, yes you did!


FLORA: Turn the radio up.


TERRY: Said in the paper it was most likely a heart attack as he had on-going heart complications.




FLORA: (OVERLAPS) Shush, shush let me listen.


TERRY: (LETS OUT A FRUSTRATED SIGH) for God’s sake woman!




RADIO NEWS REPORTER: (D) Martin was famous for staring in the long running television series If doesn’t exist aired every Saturday for 10 years in the 80’s before moving onto the big British screen, making Martin one of the most familiar faces on British TV.

Police in London have been investigating his death but have found nothing to be suspicious as he had been suffering with heart complications and a heart attack is believed to be the cause.

Martin’s daughter, Frances Robinson, said ‘He was very poorly for a while and now he is at peace, our family love him dearly and we will miss him terribly.’

Actor, Frank Turin, who co-worked with Martin on If doesn’t exist said ‘Martin was one in a million, had a heart of gold and he touched the hearts of many, he would help anyone and will be missed by so many people.’




FLORA: Absolute Bullocks!


TERRY: You didn’t like him then no?


FLORA: He was a bloody pervert!


TERRY: Woh woh woh, that’s a bit harsh Flora, the man’s dead!


FLORA: Terry, I met him once you know? When I was 15…




TERRY: Well, what happened for you to react in such hate towards him then?


FLORA: (ABRUPTLY) I don’t actually want to talk about it.




Damn! I just cut my bloody hand, Oh for fucks sake, it’s bleeding bad.




TERRY: Here quick wrap this around it… sit down dear.




Darling, hold it up and it will stop bleeding.


FLORA: Bloody hell Terry it’s too deep, you’ll need to take me to A and E.


TERRY: Let me see it… Ok there is quite a lot of blood. I’ll get my keys.



So what happened with him Flora?


FLORA: I was in the audience…








MARTIN: (D) I ope todays show has influenced the minds of my wonderful audience here in the studio and those of you at ome watching on your screens. So get recycling, get re-inventing, get motivated and do rather than say. Here on out, until next time, av a great doing and saying ‘YES’ week!








GROUP OF GIRLS: Martin… can we have your autograph?




MARTIN: One by one lady’s!


GIRL1: Love you Martin.


GIRL2: (OVERLAPS) Can I give you a kiss Martin.


GIRL 3: (OVERLAPS) Martin sign mine please.




STAGE DIRECTOR: (OVERLAPS THE GIGGLING) Come on then girls get outa here!




GIRL1: Martin, don’t ya fancy some fun?


MARTIN: Always up for some fun babe, so what ya got in mind?


GIRL2: let us come back stage an you might find out!


MARTIN: Oooh this sounds promising my little cupcakes! C’mon then!




Help ya self’s to a drink ladies, in the fridge.


GIRL1: Oooh what ya got?


GIRL2: Champagne?




GIRL1: Lovely don’t mind if I do!




MARTIN: Be a good girl and put the music on won’t ya, over there.


GIRL2: Course Martin, any preference.


MARTIN: Put the Bob Dillon record on.




Now come an sit next to ya uncle Martin!




MARTIN: (VO) See I had it so easy with the ladies. Always chucking themselves at me. What ya gotta remember is I was just a young man myself, hormones all over the place – bloody raging hormones. Ok I was a little bit older than these girls but they looked older, they acted older. They wore tiny little dresses. Covered in make up! They were hanging out in over 18’s night clubs. They were asking for it!







FLORA: He forced himself on me I tell you, I wasn’t in the least interested!


TERRY: Ooooh ok, like when we first got married? At that party, you snogging that jack ass in the pantry? He forced himself on to you did he?


FLORA: Yes yes, I told you he did.




You don’t believe me?


TERRY: Darling, I’m driving.


FLORA: Terry, I’m not lying! Terry! I don’t bloody lie!


TERRY: We’re here now.




FLORA: It is the truth Terry.


TERRY: I don’t care, just go and get your hand seen to.


FLORA: You have to make this about you don’t you?


TERRY: Ha you’re a fine one to talk! It’s always about you. You’re just a bloody attention seeker.


FLORA: Well let’s see if the police share your view!


TERRY: Go on then, report it to the police! And by the way Flora, Cat Stevens didn’t write ‘Wild World!’





TV: (D) A woman has reported a shocking allegation of historic rape against the well-known, now deceased actor Martin Robinson. The metropolitan police are taking this matter very seriously while attending to further investigations.


DEBBIE: Huh! The dirty slime ball!


SAM: Oh you don’t know if any of this is true yet! The man’s dead, he can’t speak up for himself can he?


DEBBIE: No he definitely can’t do that! There’s no smoke without fire though Sam!


SAM: Innocent until proven guilty! Can you imagine how the family must be feeling?


DEBBIE: If it is true then the sex pest will be in his nature and it won’t come as such a surprise to them, will it?


SAM: And if it isn’t true, the family must be horrified, livid! I’d be raging if anyone ever made such an allegation against my dead father!


DEBBIE: I remember him clearly on the TV I always thought there was something strange about him.


SAM: He was definitely a big character, but loveable, don’t you not think? I never sensed any sex pest vibes at all! He was a really big animal lover that says a lot about people.


DEBBIE: It’s usually the animal lovers that molest and kill little children. They love animals more than human beings!


SAM: No, they say that those as children who torture little animals grow up to be serial killers.


DEBBIE: Oh I did hear that once. Doesn’t matter he’s guilty. Haven’t you got to be somewhere?


SAM: Oh shoot! Is that the time? Better go, the dentist will charge me if I’m late; again!


DEBBIE: Here Sam




SAM: Thanks Debbie, I’ll catch up with you later ok, and you take care my love.


DEBBIE: You too, drive safely won’t you?


SAM: Always do Debbie dear.




DEBBIE: Hi can I have the number for the metropolitan police please?


OPERATOR: (D) Is it an emergency?


DEBBIE: No it’s not an emergency.


OPERATOR: (D) The number is 101. Would you like to be put through?


DEBBIE: Oh no that’s ok, 101! That’s easy to remember.




Thank you very much.




POLICE OPERATOR: (D) Can I take your name please?


DEBBIE: Debbie Ashcroft


POLICE OPERATOR: (D) Address please?


DEBBIE: 29 Kingsford Avenue, High drive road.


POLICE OPERATOR: (D) And how can I help you?


DEBBIE: I’d like to report an incident that happened a long time ago. It involves Martin Robinson, the Actor Martin Robinson. It happened in 1978.


MARTIN: (VO) Old on a minute! Ooh are you? Ooh the bleedin el are you? This woman’s a bleedin crank! I aint ever met this woman. I’d know that crank if I ever met her! Silly silly woman, what’s she playing at? Don’t listen to her!


POLICE OPERATOR: (D) Ok. What you need to do is put this in writing and send it to us or if you can pop it in to the station.


MARTIN: (VO) Pop it into the station! If I was there, I’d pop it back straight back in er ed!!


DEBBIE: Yes ok I’ll do just that, I’ll bring it in.


MARTIN: (VO) Yeah you do that what’s ya name? Debbie! Yeah you pop in the station! Any one in their right mind will see you’re a lying conniving scally!




DEBBIE: My name is Debbie Ashcroft. I am 49 years old. 49 take 15. 16, 17, 18, 19, 20… 47, 48, 49. 1, 2, 3, 4… 32, 33, 34. 34 years ago I met Martin Robinson.




My name is Debra Ashcroft. I am 49 years old. 34 years ago when I was just 15 years old I met the well-known actor Martin Robinson. He raped me.




My name is Debra Ashcroft. I am 49 years old. 34 years ago when I was just 15 years old I met the well-known actor Martin Robinson. He invited me…




He invited me back stage… I felt obliged to accept his offer… and when back stage Martin tried to kiss me, but I pushed him away. No, I tried to push him away…


MARTIN: (VO) Ya can’t even get ya story straight! What did I do Debbie? I raped you? Or tried to kiss you? What is it Debbie?




My name is Debra Ashcroft. I am 49 years old. 34 years ago when I was just 15 years old I met the well-known actor Martin Robinson. He invited me back stage. I felt obliged to accept his offer, and when back stage Martin Robinson tried to kiss me. I tried to push him away but he would not take no for an answer. He put his hand up my skirt. With a struggle I managed to get away. Therefore I would like to report Martin Robinson for molestation.


MARTIN: (VO, SHOUTS) I didn’t do this!




TV 1: (D) Another woman has reported a shocking allegation of historic sexual assault against the well-known, now deceased actor Martin Robinson. The metropolitan police are taking this matter very seriously while attending to further investigations.




TV 2: (D) Welcome back to inferno nightly news with me your host Sally Hallmark. Let’s continue with the top stories today. Another victim has stepped forward with reports of sexual assault by the deceased actor Martin Robinson.




TV 3: (D) Another of Martin Robinson’s accusers has gone public with her version of what happened inside his luxury hotel sweet back in 1978, after luring her with gifts.


RANDOM VICTIM: He brushed past me, as if by accident. I apologised, although I had no reason to but he grabbed my breasts!




TV: (D) The NNPC has set up a hotline for potential sex assault victims as there are more and more people coming forward, I think now we have an acceptance by the investigators that the scale of this truly is big and it’s growing. We have just had reports from detective Hider that they are now receiving about 16 calls a day.




TV: (D) If you are a victim of sexual abuse you can call our helpline on 0800 0901414


MARTIN: (VO) I am turning in my bleedin grave! I can’t believe this. What did I do to deserve this? My poor kids! What are my family gonna think? If I wasn’t dead I’d die of shame!





MARTIN’S SON DAVID: (D) We as Martins family are deeply hurt by all these false allegations made against our dearly beloved father. It is an act of cruel and disgusting fabrication upon a kind and considerate man who only did well for people. These are unjust accusations by women who are trying to receive credit from the media, having no consideration upon the memory of my father who is not even here to defend himself. I pledge with you the public to allow my father to rest in peace, hoping that you all have full confidence of his innocence. 


MARTIN: (VO) that’s my boy, don’t believe em David! Ask em David, Ask em why didn’t these women speak up at the time?


MARTINS FRIEND ROB: One night way back in the 70’s we hooked up with a couple of young girls. Martin was a red blooded male; granted! But he was no rapist! I mean, he didn’t need to be! Woman, yes young woman would just throw themselves at him. This one lady in mention; she was very keen to get his attention, and they had a flirt, we all went to watch a film, yeah he was trying to get intimate with her in the cinema! But she didn’t seem to have a problem with it. We all went to a park. They had sex and we then all went on to a party… and they had sex again that night after the party and again the next day, she made him breakfast, I remember! The two girls stayed at our luxury holiday apartment and we, me and Martin woke up to hot pancakes and fresh cream; actions you wouldn’t expect from a rape victim!


MARTIN: (VO) Ah I remember this! And I liked her, little treacle she was! Never thought she’d go this low though! How can she say I raped her, I can’t even say that word! She said she was 17! I didn’t force her though. Just the like the rest she threw herself at me. Ok well I suppose I knew she was lying when she said her age but well what you do? I was a 21 year old lad, the girl was bloody gorgeous. Legs up to her chin! Who could resist that?





MARTIN FROM THE DEAD:  (CLOSE) I’m not here to defend myself. But I should have been more careful. I should have made sure the girls were at least of age, that I admit I was wrong, but I never once forced myself on anyone. These woman are attention seekers, they just want their five minutes of fame and a few extra quid in their pockets, who’s to say otherwise? I really ope the public ask the question why is this coming about now when I’m dead? Why nothing was said when I was alive? It’s because it’s all lies. Well, exaggerated! I’ll never be able to prove my innocence. I just ope these woman find the decency inside themselves to admit that it’s what they wanted, that they loved a bit of attention from a well-known celeb, being wined and dined, treat em like princesses I did! They did, they loved it, every second. They bloody well knew what they were doing. It’s not like they were young children. But the media has portrayed me to be a bloody peado! It’s just outrageous and I am, I  am turning in my grave.














Reptile Girl

5 Feb

Reptile Girl

This struggle to feel connected continued, and still, this deep underlying desire continued to push Nicole to realise that there was something more. Nicole had always been interested in the supernatural and the like, so found herself quite often researching into fascinating things, especially after having conversations with people about things she was never even aware of, such as the apparent discovery of Rods. Now these rod like creatures apparently fly so fast in the air that the human eye can’t possibly see, and the only way a person can see them is by adjusting the speed settings on their camera. Nicole’s work colleague learned of them by watching a documentary on Animal Planet about these adrenaline junkies base jumping deep into a 1300 foot cave in Mexico. These inquisitive creatures were unexpectedly seen on camera footage observing and flying around these thrill seekers, as if they were playing, like the way that dolphins amuse themselves riding the bow waves of ships and surfing coastal swells. Without these supernatural and mythical aspects of life Nicole easily became bored; so eternally bored.

Nicole went for a walk to see if she can see these rods. Nicole’s not very technical when it comes to camera settings, cameras always seemed to pack in on her, and instead she takes a stroll in chance of miraculously seeing a rod, still a little sceptical, but there’s no harm in trying – her usual motto.

The ground was damp and shimmering from the sun resting on the horizon over the cars parked on the side of the road. Nicole could barely see up the road as the sun was almost blinding. So Nicole took a look behind her to refresh her eyes, and she noticed how bold the clouds appeared hovering over the illuminated rooftops, completely still. The sky bluer than expected after the rain, and the clouds aligned perfectly horizontally just above the houses. The contrasting shades of the clouds took Nicole’s mind completely away from her rod searching; Nicole took a picture and walked on until she got to the alley. Now this is where Nicole thought she might find some rods; amongst the trees. Having made way out of blind sight Nicole could really observe around the trees and in between the branches. Nicole felt conscious of looking weird in case anyone were to see her taking pictures, she quickly snapped away while suspiciously looking around and thought perhaps if these creatures did exist would they be hanging around an area where people often pass by, and next to peoples gardens? Looking through the wire mesh to her left Nicole noticed how neglected some gardens had become and wondered what kind of people let their gardens get so bad?

Nicole looked on ahead over at the hills and made it her mission to get there, with less likely distractions and much prettier attractions. Finally when Nicole reached the top of the hill she could take in the view of the other side of the council estate; the town area. You can see clearly how the town is situated in what could be described as a valley opening out to the sea, surrounded either side by the famous white cliffs of Dover, and the castle beautifully placed on the left, almost visible from any part of town.

Nicole vaguely recalls being told by her old History teacher that the castle was built by Henry the VIII. Nicole had a secret crush on him, not Henry the VIII, but her history teacher! Even though he was completely arrogant and just thought she was thick, he made no attempt at hiding it, even implying that not everyone is cut out for university, assuming she was too thick to understand that he was insinuating about her. She believed he had a secret crush on her too; this was something Nicole would never express to anyone as something almost for certain would be said jokingly in class. He thought she was just a show pony and that he could easily induce her into a squeamish hell by going into great detail of the interrogation techniques used in the Elizabethan era such as the torture rack; an instrument in which the criminals body would be slowly stretched by rollers and chains to the point of the poor persons joints becoming dislocated and eventually completely separating. The scavenger’s daughter, instead of pulling the body apart it would compress the body together. The brank, this was used to humiliate mainly woman accused of gossip, lying, and offending others, this was a cage placed on a woman’s head, and any attempt for her to talk spikes would automatically press on her tongue causing her agonising pain. The copper boot, this was secured onto the victims foot, and the torturer could use many ways to inflict excruciating pain, such as pouring molten metals or boiling water inside the boot and placing it over fire for further boiling. Brodequin, which was made from boards of wood used to crush the victims legs together so tight causing the bones to explode until bone marrow seeped out. But what really edged in her mind by the words of that history teacher was the hanged drawn and quartered! This punishment was inflicted on men having committed crimes such as treason. He described this act so brutally that this did make her squirm, along with the whole class, some covering their ears! The criminal was hanged by the neck to the brink of death, but while still alive the torturer would slice open the body, extracting the intestines and dropping them on to burning hot slabs, all while the victim is still alive. She found his attempts quite pathetic until then!

Then, at the time when the grim tales were told Nicole had no personal connections to them, life was roses, but now, thinking about what was said, all the blood and gore brought back the painful memories Nicole tried so desperately hard to forget. Nicole repeated to herself “The power of now, the power of now.” In a desperate attempt to remain present she forced herself to look around her surroundings, taking in her views to distract her damaging thought patterns from spiralling out of control. She forgot for a moment why she was here. What was the point of her coming up here? “Ah, the rods” she gasped!

Nicole looked but it was like waiting for a white board to turn black. She really focused on the atmosphere, straining her vision to see these stick like and wingless, otherwise featureless rods. Even for a flash. A quick flash just to suggest they exist. Or is the evidence all over the internet just hoaxes and fables? Nicole wasn’t sure if it was a trick of her own vision or if what she could see was actually there. And of what she could see was really there and not just a figment of her imagination, then she couldn’t work out if what she could see was close to her and very small or further away and perhaps a bit bigger. It certainly wasn’t rods what she was noticing but only what she could describe as like hovering germs, darting about, so small, almost undetectable. Nicole was thinking is this some kind of energy that humans weren’t usually tuned in to see? Had she developed or become aware of certain senses usually repressed by the human mind?  Or was it just a figment of her imagination? Or an illusion created by straining her vision?

Nicole looked back down the hill, leading back down to the estate; the messy gardens, the rundown council houses and the noise of shoddy cars, dogs barking and people shouting, and she just thought this is it isn’t it! This is all there is to life. No rods, no ghosts, no aliens… nothing but this dreary existence based on struggle. We live, we struggle and we bloody die!

This cynical attitude became a habit for Nicole, and as she walked back home, back down the hill, past the pylons towards the council estate, back through the estate past the rows of cream coloured houses, all shaped the same. All with the same grey tiled rooftops, red bricked chimneys, and doubled glazed windows with some boarded up; it never even crossed her mind that she may have just made a leap forward in evolution. Even in the past when Nicole had seen supernatural occurrences with her own eyes, with no doubt, she always managed to brush it off as some reasonable or technical explanation. As much as she wanted to believe she just couldn’t. Nicole once believed. But after everything that happened to her she kind of lost her faith, in anything, everything, even people, apart from her cats. Nicole was so alone and no one ever made any attempt to befriend her. Her only nice interaction received by anyone, was pity.

As she came off the banks onto the roundabout, turning to her left she could see a group of youngsters coming away from the road consisting of pretty much just factories. It was Sunday so this group can’t have been factory workers. She then recognised one of the lads from the estate.

‘What ya staring at weirdo?’ was his reaction.

She didn’t retaliate. This is the same lad who yells abuse at her every time she’s passed him. He’s a nasty piece of work, and he actually frightens her. So as she scurried passed, she felt like a right cockroach with her head held low.

‘Av that ya retard.’

He chucked mud at her and they all laughed. She wiped the mud off and looked at them.

‘Ahhh look, look at her face!’

‘It’s a fucking monster!’ another one shouted.

Nicole ran, she ran so fast home, and when she got home, she ran to her room and cried. She sobbed her poor heart out until her head hurt so bad she couldn’t physically cry any more.

Nicole remained numb for days, unable to get out of bed. Nicole didn’t even have any motivation to get up and eat. She just about made it to the toilet, only when having to get up to feed the cats. What ever there was in the house to eat had by now gone off. Eventually Nicole found some energy to get up, go to the bank, collect her sick pay and go to Morrison’s and buy some food – mainly because the cats needed feeding. Walking around Morrison’s every grocery was tempting, everything looked deliciously appealing. Firstly the fruit section, no, just as she walked through the barriers were a stand full of fluffy blueberry muffins calling ‘Nicole, you want to eat me, with a nice hot cup of tea to wash me away as I’m stuck on your palette,’ so in the trolley they went. Then the Fruit! Oh the strawberries were looking brighter, bigger and juicier than ever before, calling ‘Nicole you want to dip me in melted chocolate, you want to dip me in champagne, rub me on your lips and suck the juice from me.’ In the veg section Nicole picked up nearly every vegetable and thought she would make a week’s worth of stew enough to feed the homeless. Nicole bought cakes, chocolate, biscuits, crisps, crackers, bread, buns, crumpets, the bloody lot! She stocked up on tins, pasta, rice and heaps of different sauces. Nicole filled her trolley with stuff from every isle, things she wouldn’t use or even need. Her trolley was over flowing, literally. She even planned to come back and get more.

This was the first sign of Nicole’s mania. Her shopping wouldn’t end even when skint. She would continue to shop – but not pay! Nicole was now invincible; her mind working too fast to be aware of anything going on around her, she was liable for causing accidents. Just like the fire that killed her sleeping lover, and left her burnt, scarred, and physically disfigured.

Just like then; now; Nicole was conjuring up a plan – a plan for revenge! That boy, the one who took the mick, who laughed at her face, he was going down, and he would go down in the most sickening, humiliating and painful way Nicole could imagine. Nicole prepared a room in her house. She nailed hooks in the walls, attached Ann Summers handcuffs. She laid out an array of freshly sharpened kitchen knives, sowing needles, darts, and a staple gun on a table made of wicker. She also prepared duct tape, anaesthetic and pepper spray. She covered the walls in gruesome pictures printed from the internet. She tied a rope to the lamp shade. All was ready and perfect for when she brought this nasty rogue to her home. That part was easy. She was to lure him in with pot, cigarettes and beer. She would get him there, and spike him with sleeping pills and he would wake up handcuffed to the wall, feet tied and duct taped at the mouth. Nicole knew exactly what she was going to do to this brute. In her mind for the benefit of mankind! “Indeed” she thought “This young man is going to suffer!”